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Getting Ready Tuesday, May. 20, 2003 - 11:47 pm ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Wow. So tomorrow the Flipside madness begins, since we're picking up Kevissimo and Ernesto from the airport and taking them grocery shopping and stuff. Wow. I feel really ready to get out there. Monday is my 27th birthday. And Sunday night will be the big fire at Flipside. I really want to write out some of the icky junk I'm holding onto and throw it in the fire and watch it burn away. I'm also planning to write letters to myself. I may not do this til I get back home. One of the Artist's Way exercises was to write a letter to your present self from your 8 year old self. It made me wish I had actually written a letter to my future self when I was a kid, which got me thinking. My husband and I discussed it and we decided that we want to start this future letter writing as a family birthday tradition. Basically that on your birthday you write at least one letter to a future self to read on their birthday. And we want to encourage our kids to do this too, when they show up and learn to write. So anyway, I'm going to write a few letters to a few future selves. I'm kind of excited about it. I've got some kind of weird idea about the summer. I want the summer to be a kind of preparation, or extreme liminal phase. Basically as preparation for Burning Man. I want Burning Man to break me open. But I know I have to be mentally, emotionally, and spiritually ready. I have to be somewhat open already. Something else I've been thinking about today is about readiness. An example is meeting my husband. We met at Burning Man 99, but we were both present at Burning Man 98, and camped fairly near each other, and almost certainly would have met at Audrey and Matthew's wedding if he hadn't gotten sick and gone to the hospital. The Universe didn't let us meet, because we weren't ready to meet. I noticed this same kind of thing with two other things recently. The smaller one is this CD I just got, Further On... by Grey Eye Glances. I heard about them from my friend Caution in LA about 3 years ago. She played me this CD a bunch and let me borrow it to burn a copy, which I never did, and I liked it but I never got into it much. Suddenly I'm just crazy for it. It's fairly powerful music. I realized today that I don't think I was ready for it in my life yet, when Caution introduced me to it. The other thing involves Cookie (of course, you could have guessed that, couldn't you). No but really. He remembers me from Flipside last year. Why I don't know, because we didn't even speak. I don't remember him at all and definitely didn't meet him, even though there was an opportunity. I think I wasn't ready to meet him. I think at that time he was still his suboptimal self, for lack of a better word, and I don't know if I would have been able to connect with him. It's got me wondering what else I'm getting now because now I'm ready. Or what I'm getting ready for. Hmm, readiness. Probably won't be writing again til after Flipside. Monday or Tuesday.
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Crummy - Monday, Jul. 12, 2004 Can't Decide - Monday, Jun. 07, 2004 Letting Go - Friday, Jun. 04, 2004 Google 5 - Tuesday, May. 18, 2004 Before Tattoo - Wednesday, May. 12, 2004 older entries random entry profile * sign my guestbook* For a more complete view of my life, read these: live journal ~ gratitude journal DiaryLand |