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What am I scared of? Thursday, Aug. 21, 2003 - 12:00 am ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I'm very reluctant to really write anything the last few days. I can feel all this anxiety just below the surface, and I guess I'm kinda trying to keep it at bay, and I feel like writing will only release it. Actually now that I've said that, I feel like I should find a way to release it before the playa. But what. And I suddenly feel real crunched for time. Hmm. Maybe writing in my notebook right now would help. I also start to get kind of annoyed with myself because my thoughts seem so repetitive. Stuart and Burning Man and that's it. I could go back and forth talking about one or the other and I feel sort of tired of both as writing subjects. I want something to happen instead of me just writing about things I want to happen or what I'm afraid will happen or whatever. Ok, there is a part of me that is totally completely fucking freaked out. I know I'm going to be ok on the playa. I know it. So where is this coming from? And why do I keep relating it to Stuart? What is my brain doing? What am I scared of?
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Crummy - Monday, Jul. 12, 2004 Can't Decide - Monday, Jun. 07, 2004 Letting Go - Friday, Jun. 04, 2004 Google 5 - Tuesday, May. 18, 2004 Before Tattoo - Wednesday, May. 12, 2004 older entries random entry profile * sign my guestbook* For a more complete view of my life, read these: live journal ~ gratitude journal DiaryLand |